Dear Black Kids,
I’m going to follow this irritating trend I’ve been seeing with celebrities writing these boring open letters about vapid, stupid things like Miley Cyrus’s future/well-being. I want to write a letter to African American kids argh, people of slave decent that live in this country and anyone of color really who is constantly subjected to prejudicial standards, constantly told they are to be a certain way or suffer the dire consequences of being ostracized and ridiculed. You are not alone.
Let me tell you an anecdotal tale of ignorance that has stuck with me for years. Don’t worry it’s not in the bad way where I think about it every night before I go to bed, tearful and broken down, begging for some kind of solace in solitude. I don’t rock back and forth in the dark praying for this experience to disappear from my brain matter forever. It actually makes me kind of sad and a little bit angry, which does nothing but drive me to be as me as possible.
It was a late night after dance class. My friend’s mom picked us up and we could barely contain our excitement in the back seat of the car for we were on our way to see the SpiceWorld. We excitedly chatted in the back about our favorite spice girls (Scary was mine and Sporty was hers - the best two if you ask me). Mid-conversation her mother turned around and said to me, “You speak so well. You sound just like a white girl.” I was stunned. My ten-year old self knew what she was saying sounded inherently wrong because I didn’t understand what “speaking white” meant let alone the fact she was insinuating black people were not allowed to speak a certain way. Now, let me clear something else up since we’re on the topic of vernacular. This is another lesson I had to learn thanks to mainstream media and a heap of other prejudices I embarrassingly collected, unknowingly, over the years. The way you speak does not define you. This is maybe one of the most important lessons that are never taught. It doesn’t matter what words you use to express yourself they are not in direct correlation with intellect, compassion, empathy, passion, etc. How you speak is merely something taught. No one should feel they need to speak a certain way to fit in or be comfortable in this country. People DO need to heed their personal issues with race and language and not be judgey assholes like I once was and I’m not going to lie, sometimes, still am. I try to check myself as often as possible to remind myself not to fall into the man-eating trap of racism and stereotyping. Anyway, that comment was the first of many I would endure over the course of eight years from middle school all the way through high school.
This letter is for those black kids who were/are called “white” because of how they speak, dress, the music they listen to, the movies they like. This letter is for the black kids who want to break out of these ridiculous stereotypes and represent themselves instead of an ideal perpetuated and almost mandated by this now secretly racist society. Don’t be daft. Racism has not ceased to exist because there is a black president, au contraire it has become more clandestine, more cunning and exposes itself oh so subtlety in the underrepresented models of color, in the exoticized black character in sitcoms and dramas, in the “she/he looks good for a black woman/man” comments among scores of others.
This letter is for those black kids who so desperately want to be something more than their skin color. It’s for those kids who will never forget where they came from but are ready to move forward to where they want to be. This letter is to explain that there is no one in this world who is allowed to tell you who you are except for you. This letter is a plea to society to back the hell up off these racial constructs that have done nothing but harm and divide a nation that is in need of major healing.
A lot has changed since I was a kid. This whole “natural hair phenomenon” alone is enough to make my head spin. It’s fantastic! However, it is a baby step in the right direction. Tyler Perry movies still exist so movement will always be a bit stunted, in my opinion. The rage he incites in me is unparalleled. I digress.
In conclusion, be you. You are beautiful no matter what they say. Yes, I just used a Christina Aguilera lyric, but it is true. No matter what anyone says you are beautiful. You just have to believe it. No one can have any power over you unless you let them. Ok, yeah, that was Eleanor Roosevelt. Again, it’s true. No one is allowed to tell you who you are.
I will close this letter with a quote from the late Amiri Baraka,
“There’s no intrinsic value of being black; there’s no intrinsic value of being white. It’s a fake concept, but certainly I’ve…been oppressed by it all my life.”
Don’t let these concepts oppress you.
Love from the moon and back again,
Christina