Last night’s loud and confusing fever dream was topped off by utter disbelief and candid coverage of news stations far and wide. The news didn’t mince words, which I appreciated. Most of the opinions of the debate were understandably inconclusive because of egregious behavior displayed by the literal President of the United States. In the few moments where we could hear either of the candidates, things were said that just felt empty and rehearsed. The event that was supposed to get democrats excited about their lackluster pick, and show the nation there was a serious contender to the orange Mussolini was marred by his outlandish (mis)behavior and disregard for decency.
#SayHerName: Breonna Taylor
Anger? Yes. Frustration? Absolutely. Surprise? Yes and no. The ruling we have all been waiting months for, especially Breonna Taylor’s family, yielded a sentence that was not only insulting but a declaration of the gross negligence of our justice system. Wanton Endangerment charged to one police officer for shooting into other houses and no mention at all of the death of a young woman. Our pleas didn’t matter, our screams didn’t matter, the evidence didn’t matter, the facts didn’t matter. What continues to matter is an unbalanced, unfair judicial system that rewards and encourages black death and ignores black rights. Breonna Taylor’s story has been told by so many different voices and with so much hope for her justice and today that drive for hope came to a screeching halt.
Still Processing...
Narrowsburg, NY - you lookin good grrrrl…until I see a Trump sign -_-
I feel like a computer with that hour-glass that’s constantly flipping or that forever-spinning color wheel with no indication that the processing will stop. I feel like every day there is something else that I have to consume and make sense of before letting it settle into my memory bank of disappointment and exhaustion.
Social Media & Me
I’ve been thinking about the internet a lot lately. More specifically, I’ve been thinking about social media and how it’s been effective in so many different ways to connect, to divide, to provide hope and solace, or grief and anguish. It’s been on my mind more frequently with all of the time I’ve personally been spending on it, which is a tremendous amount in comparison to pre-pandemic. Of course, that is everyone. The uptick in live Instagram streams, the influx of folks on TikTok, the amount of tweets being published, we’re all figuring out how to cope with this new normal and heavily depending on a form of socializing that is safe and entertaining has given us comfort.
Compartmentalizing & Spiraling
It’s a term I’ve heard more recently in the last few years to refer to ways people neatly package up their intense feelings or emotions away from the world in order to focus on tasks at hand and function somewhat “normally.” I heard it even more recently, today, in a discussion where it was brought up how we, as black women, have to compartmentalize during these incredibly stressful times in order to keep functioning. At first I felt proud of what that meant. It meant I was able to channel my emotions in a way that wouldn’t interfere with work and let them out when I had time and space to do so, be it on the weekends or taking time off. Then I thought about it deeper and it made me furious to think that is something to be proud of and even more so to be acceptable in society. Humans should NOT be compartmentalizing shit to keep working.