Today commemorates another pointless holiday where some dude thinks he discovered America while other people were still living here. Isn’t Columbus Day enough?! Of course, the only reason I know about this ridiculous day is social media. I was like…
Mr. Erikson was a Norseman who stumbled upon this land around 500 years before Columbus, but historians claim he is not the first one to drunkenly steer their ship to this land o’ the free. Whatever. I just lost some brain capacity reading about him. Thanks, Twitter and Wikipedia.
Speaking of social media, I’ve been off of Facebook for like a month now. Maybe longer. I’ve lost count now after the initial withdrawal that included, sweating, heart palpitations and chronic phantom Facebook checks where I would frantically look for that unforgettable “F” icon on my phone to see who was posting about their latest food conquest. Luckily, Instagram has somewhat filled the void that was slowly eating away at my necessity to know useless facts about (for all intensive purposes) strangers. That initial few days though had me questioning my (inadequate) self-control.
I’m now content with not knowing what people are doing every second of every day. Read: I’ve found other modes of internet stalking that seem less intrusive but probably more creepy…
You know what’s been creeping me out, though? Ebola. That’s right, the zombie apocalypse-type disease that has the news all in a flurry as there is nothing else of importance going on in the world except for this one guy in Texas who got himself Ebola so now we’re all gonna die. It’s pandemonium everywhere you turn… on the TV. People are going crazy thinking about the implications of what this all means, according to reporters. There is a 10000% chance it’s going to spread everywhere, said no doctors. There’s some disease that shows itself every year that embarrassingly excites the media. I think if we’re going to talk about Ebola, we should talk about how to cure the people who are being plagued by the disease, not whine about it “REACHING THE USA!” Lest we forget, though we’re America-the-best-f*cking-country-in -the-world-yours-sucks, we’re not the ONLY country. How about we, I don’t know, HELP OTHERS?! Just a thought…
Happy Thursday,
